---
title: Life Groups and the Heart of a Teacher
description: Sustaining and stewarding a school's culture through generations is the responsibility of each of us. Wednesday's inservice day for faculty took a non-traditional approach to professional development; one that will undoubtedly have a significant impact on student learning.
image: https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/hubfs/Blog_Pics/Academic_Lens/2018-2019%20Academic%20Lens/Pro%20Dev%20Life%20Groups/45679106295_2ec3c40c24_o.jpg
---

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## Life Groups and the Heart of a Teacher

Posted by [Scott Allenby](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/author/scott-allenby)

01/03/2019

Sustaining and stewarding a school's culture through generations is the responsibility of each of us. Wednesday's inservice day for faculty took a non-traditional approach to professional development. There was no discussion of curriculum mapping, professional goals, or strategic initiatives that will drive Proctor forward in the most competitive boarding school market any of us have ever seen. Instead, we talked about our personal lives in small “life groups” of 8-10 colleagues.

![Proctor Academy Boarding School Faculty](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/hs-fs/hubfs/Blog_Pics/Academic_Lens/2018-2019%20Academic%20Lens/Pro%20Dev%20Life%20Groups/45679106295_2ec3c40c24_o.jpg?width=6720&name=45679106295_2ec3c40c24_o.jpg)

Each stage of life feels complicated. Our students know how tough their lives feel at times, and we believe it is important they see open, honest adults surrounding them. Adults who wrestle with and celebrate all aspects of life. Our young faculty group shared they always look ahead to the next milestone of life with anticipation, thinking maybe life will get easier once they get married or find a partner, start a family, buy a piece of property. We all know life does not get less complicated with age, we never ‘arrive’ at our life’s destination. It is a journey, which is why taking intentional time to reflect on the common good, bad, and ugly in our own lives not only reinforces our bonds of friendship with our colleagues, but offers a powerful reassurance we are not in this alone.

![Proctor Academy Boarding School Faculty](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/hs-fs/hubfs/Blog_Pics/Academic_Lens/2018-2019%20Academic%20Lens/Pro%20Dev%20Life%20Groups/patty-1.jpg?width=6630&name=patty-1.jpg)

## “I am painfully aware of the times in my own teaching when I lose touch with my inner teacher, and therefore with my own authority… Authority comes as I reclaim my identity and integrity, remembering my selfhood and my sense of vocation. Then teaching can come from the depths of my own truth – and the truth that is within my students has a chance to respond in kind.”

##  Parker Palmer [The Heart of a Teacher](http://www.couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/heart-of-a-teacher/)

![Proctor Academy Boarding School Faculty](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/hs-fs/hubfs/Blog_Pics/Academic_Lens/2018-2019%20Academic%20Lens/Pro%20Dev%20Life%20Groups/576A4305.jpg?width=6720&name=576A4305.jpg)

The brainchild of longtime faculty members Patty Pond, Karl Methven, and the late Dave Pilla during a TLG conversation last spring, splitting into life groups for an extended morning of non-professional, but oh-so-important conversation served as the perfect launching point for the new year. Regardless of whether the group of faculty were millennials discussing the benefits and challenges of their first job at boarding school, 40-somethings pondering how to balance their own families with the immersive demands of working at Proctor, or veterans of more than 35 years in boarding schools talking about what has kept them fired up about teaching at Proctor for so long (and the uncertainty of their approaching retirement), the themes that emerged were remarkably consistent.

![Proctor Academy Boarding School Faculty](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/hs-fs/hubfs/Blog_Pics/Academic_Lens/2018-2019%20Academic%20Lens/Pro%20Dev%20Life%20Groups/576A4270.jpg?width=6720&name=576A4270.jpg)

![Proctor Academy Boarding School Faculty](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/hs-fs/hubfs/Blog_Pics/Academic_Lens/2018-2019%20Academic%20Lens/Pro%20Dev%20Life%20Groups/576A4301.jpg?width=6720&name=576A4301.jpg)

As each age-group shared their advice for other groups, individual threads of conversation wove together the experiences of faculty more than forty years apart in age into a shared understanding of why we are so committed to working at Proctor and to nurturing the culture those before us helped build. For anyone considering a career at Proctor (or in any boarding school for that matter), our faculty offer the following pieces of advice:  

1. **The stewardship of Proctor’s school culture is EACH of our responsibility regardless of our age, experience, or role at the school.**
2. **Carving out time for self care (exercise, meditation, yoga, etc.) within the daily busyness of the school year is absolutely critical to doing our best work with our students. We must never, ever feel guilty about taking care of ourselves.**
3. **Having an identity, hobby, passion, or endeavor outside of Proctor is not only healthy, but critical to staying fresh and energized as a boarding school educator.**
4. **Because none of us are in this business to get rich, regularly scheduled time to manage finances and establish financial discipline should be required of everyone.**
5. **The friendships of our colleagues sustain us through good times and bad. Invest deeply in these friendships.**

**![Proctor Academy Boarding School Faculty](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/hs-fs/hubfs/kate%20Jill.jpg?width=6720&name=kate%20Jill.jpg)**

![Proctor Academy Boarding School Faculty](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/hs-fs/hubfs/Blog_Pics/Academic_Lens/2018-2019%20Academic%20Lens/Pro%20Dev%20Life%20Groups/Sue.jpg?width=6095&name=Sue.jpg)

Our work as boarding school educators amplifies the need to seek perspective and balance. There is no time clock to punch, no illusion of leaving the stresses of work at the office. Our home is our work and our work is our home, and we wouldn't have it any other way. This beautiful existence of a lifestyle vocation requires all of us, and in turn, we must always be conscious of how we care for ourself so that we may continue to pour into our students.  

![576A4237](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/hs-fs/hubfs/Blog_Pics/Academic_Lens/2018-2019%20Academic%20Lens/Pro%20Dev%20Life%20Groups/576A4237.jpg?width=6720&name=576A4237.jpg)

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- [April 2018 (22)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2018/04)
- [March 2018 (13)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2018/03)
- [February 2018 (23)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2018/02)
- [January 2018 (20)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2018/01)
- [December 2017 (13)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2017/12)
- [November 2017 (19)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2017/11)
- [October 2017 (17)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2017/10)
- [September 2017 (14)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2017/09)
- [August 2017 (7)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2017/08)
- [July 2017 (4)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2017/07)
- [June 2017 (8)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2017/06)
- [May 2017 (27)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2017/05)
- [April 2017 (24)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2017/04)
- [March 2017 (16)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2017/03)
- [February 2017 (26)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2017/02)
- [January 2017 (22)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2017/01)
- [December 2016 (16)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2016/12)
- [November 2016 (22)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2016/11)
- [October 2016 (23)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2016/10)
- [September 2016 (16)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2016/09)
- [August 2016 (7)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2016/08)
- [July 2016 (5)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2016/07)
- [June 2016 (11)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2016/06)
- [May 2016 (25)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2016/05)
- [April 2016 (23)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2016/04)
- [March 2016 (16)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2016/03)
- [February 2016 (29)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2016/02)
- [January 2016 (18)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2016/01)
- [December 2015 (17)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/12)
- [November 2015 (17)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/11)
- [October 2015 (22)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/10)
- [September 2015 (13)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/09)
- [August 2015 (6)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/08)
- [July 2015 (7)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/07)
- [June 2015 (8)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/06)
- [May 2015 (27)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/05)
- [April 2015 (19)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/04)
- [March 2015 (14)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/03)
- [February 2015 (24)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/02)
- [January 2015 (21)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/01)
- [December 2014 (16)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2014/12)
- [November 2014 (18)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2014/11)
- [October 2014 (20)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2014/10)
- [September 2014 (17)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2014/09)
- [August 2014 (6)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2014/08)

see all

### Recent Stories

### Telling the Proctor story

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Located in  Andover, NH,  Proctor Academy is a private coeducational day and boarding school for grades 9–12. Students benefit from a rigorous academic program, experiential off-campus programs, fine and performing arts, competitive athletics, and a wide selection of extracurricular activities.

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