---
title: Symptoms of Disconnect and Proctor's Remedy
description: "As we work to build a healthy environment for adolescents to thrive, we must look beyond seeing technology as a cause of anxiety to a symptom of the underlying struggle so many of us face: connection."
image: https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/hubfs/Blog_Pics/Community/2019-2020%20Community/Connection%20and%20Tech/Connection%203.jpg
---

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## Symptoms of Disconnect and Proctor's Remedy

Posted by [Scott Allenby](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/author/scott-allenby)

09/17/2019

The constant pressure of social comparisons and curating our own digital reality weighs on us. As we work to build a healthy environment for adolescents to thrive, we must look beyond seeing technology as a cause of anxiety and instead view it as a symptom of the underlying struggle so many of us face today: true connection and meaning. 

![Proctor Academy Prep School Boarding School Technology Anxiety](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/hs-fs/hubfs/Blog_Pics/Community/2019-2020%20Community/Connection%20and%20Tech/Connection%203.jpg?width=6720&name=Connection%203.jpg)

The energy on campus over the past three weeks has matched the meteorological perfection that is September in New Hampshire. New students, faculty, and staff settle into the rhythm of the year and begin to see opportunities to shape the 2019-2020 version of Proctor. An institutional focus on wellness has pulsed throughout the community since opening year faculty meetings. Open discussions with students and faculty about the impacts of vaping and e-cigarettes on our adolescents, sharing the benefits of yoga and mindfulness practices, eliminating our technology use in public spaces like the meeting house and dining hall, and intentionally connecting new students with returning students through mentoring relationships have made a difference. 

![Proctor Academy Prep School Boarding School Technology Anxiety](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/hs-fs/hubfs/Blog_Pics/Community/2019-2020%20Community/Connection%20and%20Tech/Connection%202.jpg?width=6318&name=Connection%202.jpg)

These layered conversations as a whole community in assembly, in advisories, in dormitories, and on teams give license to our student body to engage honestly with these issues, to really explore the intersection of technology, substance, and anxiety in their own lives and those of their peers. Technology - society’s failed attempt at enhancing interpersonal connection - may bridge geographical gaps with family and friends, but leaves us on a never-ending quest for meaning as we get lost in a web of superficial relationships . All the while, we continue to neglect the time we need to find ourselves and our place within our communities. 

![Proctor Academy Prep School Boarding School Technology Anxiety](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/hs-fs/hubfs/Blog_Pics/Community/2019-2020%20Community/Connection%20and%20Tech/Connection%201.jpg?width=6564&name=Connection%201.jpg)

Making sense of the world isn’t easy. We all struggle to find meaning and purpose in our lives. We question the decisions we make, the vocation we chose, the life we seek to provide our children. As we question, we fall prey to the manipulation of media, advertising, and social comparison. We count likes, “friends”, views, and comments as external validation of our internal narrative. As adults, we often feel ill-equipped to combat the barrage of stimuli we face, let alone guide our students through their own battles. 

![Proctor Academy Prep School Boarding School Technology Anxiety](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/hs-fs/hubfs/Blog_Pics/Community/2019-2020%20Community/Connection%20and%20Tech/Connection%205.jpg?width=6720&name=Connection%205.jpg)

When we ask students why they chose Proctor, we receive a list of programs: [Learning Skills](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/academic-lens-how-learning-skills-makes-a-difference), [skiing](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/proctor-athletics-proctor-ussa/fis-season-in-review), [Ocean Classroom](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/topic/ocean-classroom), [Proctor en Segovia](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/topic/proctor-en-segovia), social entrepreneurship, mountain biking, the list goes on and on. What we really know, however, is the intangibles of community that undergird our programs are what draws families to Proctor. Programs are merely a feature of our school, a feature that will evolve and change over time based on demand and personnel. They do not define us, and never should. Instead it is the people, the relationships and connections made between students and the adults in their lives, that define us. 

![Proctor Academy Prep School Boarding School Technology Anxiety](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/hs-fs/hubfs/Blog_Pics/Community/2019-2020%20Community/Connection%20and%20Tech/Connection%206.jpg?width=6720&name=Connection%206.jpg)

It is this sense of community and the resulting vulnerability that simultaneously unlocks learning and empowers students to, often for the first time in their lives, look inward at who they want to become. This is the magic that can happen when schools work toward solving an underlying issue (connection), rather than simply looking for a remedy to a symptom (technology). We are still figuring it out, but we think we might be onto something! 

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- [October 2016 (23)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2016/10)
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- [February 2016 (29)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2016/02)
- [January 2016 (18)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2016/01)
- [December 2015 (17)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/12)
- [November 2015 (17)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/11)
- [October 2015 (22)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/10)
- [September 2015 (13)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/09)
- [August 2015 (6)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/08)
- [July 2015 (7)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/07)
- [June 2015 (8)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/06)
- [May 2015 (27)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/05)
- [April 2015 (19)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/04)
- [March 2015 (14)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/03)
- [February 2015 (24)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/02)
- [January 2015 (21)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2015/01)
- [December 2014 (16)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2014/12)
- [November 2014 (18)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2014/11)
- [October 2014 (20)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2014/10)
- [September 2014 (17)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2014/09)
- [August 2014 (6)](https://blogs.proctoracademy.org/archive/2014/08)

see all

### Recent Stories

### Telling the Proctor story

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Located in  Andover, NH,  Proctor Academy is a private coeducational day and boarding school for grades 9–12. Students benefit from a rigorous academic program, experiential off-campus programs, fine and performing arts, competitive athletics, and a wide selection of extracurricular activities.

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